Klabautermann's Tale
by EspellaEve0124E
Summary: Two Strawhat crewmates left behind Sabaody archipelago recalls their crewmates as they survive for two years alone. (discontinued)


It was raining at Sabaody Archipelago, but the weather didn't stop Vodkan, the captain of the Vodkan pirates from getting drunk. And when Vodkan got drunk, the more troubles he caused.

And cause trouble he did.

* * *

 **Sabodian Cheers, Area 18**

"Father, Shouldn't we get them to leave while we still can?" "Then we shall have to pay the consequence for it later. Be patient and be prepared for what's to come." "Shit. Why did it have to be our place for those bastards decided to drink?" Beru whispered to his father, the barkeeper Baru. Baru just shook his head.

"Hey, you boy! What did you just yak about!?" The two-man winced slightly. The entire bar went quiet. A red face Vodkan pirate was glaring at Beru. Customers who did leave upon noticing the arrival of the Vodkan pirates started either prepared to run away or hide under their tables. 'Well, this is it.' Beru thought nervously before glancing at his father. He was surprised to see he was smiling.

"Oh, nothing sir. My boy here was just talking about the Strawhats' ship in area 41."

The pirate, being confused by the owner's smile scratched his head. "Strawhat, Strawhat, hmm̊̊…where did I hear that name before?" His shipmate roared in laughter. "Big Joe, sometimes I wonder if your shit goes to your head instead of your butt. They're the crew beat up a Celestial dragon a few months ago. Don't you remember?" "No, no. Con. That's their captain. 'Strawhat' Luffy. Ya know, the one of the Worst generation?"

With that, the pirates wrapped themselves up in a rapid conversation. The rest sighed in relief. Baru went back to clearing the glass mugs. Customers placed their tabs on the table and quickly and silently. Beru went around and collected them before they got lost in the inevitable fight. 'Ugh. only coins. must've paid them. Let's see, oops!' he dropped one of the coins and it rolled toward one of the tables. A hand went down and picked it up. Beru blinked. A customer was still at the bar.

It was a queer customer. Wearing a long yellow raincoat with its hood up but, as Baru noticed, and found it odd, the customer was not wearing any shoes. "Here. you dropped this." It was a young voice. A females' in fact. He snapped back to attention. "Thank you. Anything I can get you?" At this, she turned her hooded head toward the rowdy pirates. "A mug of beer would be fine. If you have any left that is." "I'll go and see." He went around the pirate crew as far as possible and went over to his father. "Father-" "No. We don't have any beer left. He took the last one." He pointed at a pirate who just opened the barrel and poured himself a fresh mug.

"That's much better! So, anyway, they haven't been caught yet, have they?"

"Not that I know of. If one of them HAVE been caught, The Marines would have made a big fuss about it and made a grand show out of it, just like they did with Gold Rodger." "Kha-ha-ha! Ca-man, dis is da Celestial dragons we'a takin' about. They would think of somethin' more creative den dat!" "Anyways, why DID Strawhat gave the CD the old-one-two anyway? He has to be stupid to do something crazy like that."

"I know the answer."

* * *

Everyone got quiet, including the Vodkan pirates.

A man with a prideful smile on his face set down his huge empty mug on the table with a loud bang. It was 'Dead drunk' Vodkan, the captain of the Vodkan pirates whose bounty reached 100,000,000 berries. One of the highest in the archipelago.

"That's because he is stupid."

He snickered and repeated himself: "He IS stupid."

"Not just because no sane man would harm a Celestial dragon, no. It's more insane than that. Does anyone here know what I'm talking about?" The captain looked around his crew with an expectant look. Everyone shuffled nervously in their seats. One of them had to come with the correct answer, fast. Or their captain would 'punish' them in an unthinkable way. "I'll tell you why!" Vodkan banged another huge empty mug on the table. All the pirates made nervous faces at one another. It was never good news when their captain got this overexcited and talked a lot and answering his own questions to boot. This meant that either he was half drunk or very highly amused. And when Vokan was amused usually someone else got unhappy. Very unhappy. Vodkan looked around the room for a grand effect.

"HE ACTUALLY HIT A CELESTIAL DRAGON JUST TO SAVE A FISHMAN!"

Oh, dear here we go again. Most of the pirates shifted uncomfortably in their seats. Things got pretty uncomfortable when Vodkan started to rant about the class between the races. Most of them didn't care much about Vodkn's Fishmen is fish' theory. They enjoyed hanging out on Mermaid island whenever they got a chance. They sometimes felt sympathy for the captured non-human species traded at the now-closed human shop.

"FISHMEN! Stupid ugly specimens with teeny weeny brains! Covered in nothing but scales from head to toe. just thinking about it makes my appetite go away. If there IS a God, the wise generous God, would NOT have put any good in their souls from cringing from their ugliness! Heck, I bet he wouldn't even WANT to put souls in their bodies! Machines! That's what they are! Soulless machines. Good for only doing labor work. It is a clear sign that having skin is much better than having gills or fins or scales. Some say, then what about the mermaids Vodkan? They must deserve some slack? HA! Why should I!? Just because They're half fish and half human I should cut some slack? If you stop to think about it, they're grosser than the original fishes! Yes, they might be pretty, but they're still fishes in the inside! They lure innocent men by their looks and when they're in their clutches, they abuse them in worst ways possible! by God, if we treat them same as we, the Humans, the greatness of our civilization and our great intelligent minds will start to decline to THEIR level!

Vodkan cackled and had another big gulp of beer.

* * *

Bang! Bang! Bang!

* * *

It was all of a sudden. For a split second, no one had realized what had happened.

Then, all of a sudden, Baru let out a coughed out blood and fell down with a loud thud. Everyone stared. The bar had gone completely quiet. Quiet from utter disbelief. Quiet for grand effect. Quiet from disgust: From all those above.

"'Specter' Baruda. Bounty of 500,000,000. Captain of the Demon pirates, Disappeared more than 20 years ago when Garp disbanded the crew, Who would have thought that The Specter would be running a bar here, or has consumed Seastone to subdue his powers, or that he had married a Hammerhead shark mermaid and had two children? The rest of your fishes at mermaid island, hmm?" Vodkan snarled and fired another shot at Baru. "Father!" "Be quiet, boy. I'm being patient and not firing at you. Yet. But one more move, your shame of a pirate father will be dead sooner than needed." He snarled and turned back to the unmoving Baru and spat at his face. "Stooping so low that you actually married a fish. You filthy scum."

"…Shut your mouth. And apologies to Mira." Baru staggered upright and pulled out a gun and pointed at Vodkan. "Oh? Acting so strong now, are we?" Vodkan cackled. "…Captain, sir. I think we need to stop this, now. You're more drunk than usual. If you kill him now, your reputation will decrease dramatically. Your image now as a racist isn't good with the other pirates as well-" "Whaddya mean, reputation? I kill the man, get his devil fruit powers, get the reputation of being the killer of 'The Specter'! That's more pros than cons, Mr. Ivanka! And do you think things can calm down going this far? We've already crossed into the Grand Line!" The pirates shifted uncomfortably and avoided eye contact with their captain. "Well, what are you staring at? Go stand guard and go hold those two." Instantly four pirates grabbed Beru and the yellow hooded customer and the rest went and stood guard. "If you're going to kill me, spare the boy." "Father!" "He's just a filthy half-fish brood pretending to be human. Killing him will be a great service to humanity." "You Vile-" "Vile? The real vile ones are people like you. People like Strawhat."

* * *

KA-BLAM!

* * *

Every head turned to the source of the noise.

"Sorry for breaking the floor, but."

The two pirates had their heads bashed into the floors.

"I couldn't take any more insults. Luffy might have a rubber brain. And he might be an idiot. But by Oda, that doesn't mean he can be compared to people like you." The yellow hooded customer twirled the giant two-handed wooden hammer in the air. "So, I'll be taking you out now, old timer. Duck now, mister." "Hup!" Beru ducked his head just as the hammer bashed the two pirates holding him with a satisfying crunch. "now, then. Other people, sirs, I hope you stay back as I deal with your captain."

The customer pulled the hood back and popped out two cute ram's horns and tumbled out a waterfall of white hair like milk poured out of a cantine. The customer was a young girl with marble white skin, cloud white hair, cream-colored horns, pure white sleeveless dress with ivory wooden bracelets and anklets. The only part about her that wasn't white was her giant hammer, yellow raincoat with a hood, and her eyes which was pure black, unlike a ram'. "Let's finish this quick. I have a sore back and it gets worse when it rains."

'What are you? An old lady with back acne?' Everyone thought incredulously while still in awe of her beautiful appearance.

"A Zoen Hybrid brat? You? Fight me? One on one? You have nerve…" He was cut short as the giant hammer missed him by seconds. "Why you little…" Vodkan growled. "I'm going to teach you a lesson that you're not going to forget!"

"My name is MERRY! And I'm going to teach YOU a lesson that you're not GOING to forget!"

 **TO BE CONTINUED...**

* * *

Note. Rewrote it. More than three months later. I made some changes to the parts I found disturbing. Klabutermanns' tale was planned to be a short story originally. And turning it into something longer has caused some problems for me like, 'How am I going to detail this?' "Should I go with the original plot or fix it up?' That's my problem. Writing something instantly when something comes to me and then have no idea how to finish it up. I WILL try to finish this up as it is one of my ever first One piece fic projects. But if it gets extreme, I'll just have to call it quits and post the original short story and be done with it. I currently have two other One piece story plotting going on and I can't spare much time doing this and that with my busy schedule about to go busier in March. So, anyway, enjoy the story and happy readings!

-EspellaEve0124E, 02.20.19


End file.
